Ohana

I'm feeling very sentimental today.  Not only is it my birthday (thank you everyone for the warm wishes), but it is also the day my loving husband proposed to me.  It was two years ago today that I said, "Yes, I will marry you!"  We've had our share of ups and downs, but I wouldn't give it up for the world.  The things I've gotten from our bond are way more important to me than the things I had without.  I love you Chad and can't wait for the rest of our lives to unfold.  I feel a great many things are in store for us and it can only get better.
Today I've also been spending a lot of time in reflection over the past weekend.  This past weekend I spent a lot of time with family.  I helped my sister, Amy, move from Orlando to Knoxville and had a blast.  It was great taking a road trip with her.  She had never been on one before and it was great.  Especially once we got into the mountains.  The expressions on her face were priceless.  But it was equally awesome to see the way she looked at the majesty of the mountains and trees with their brightly colored leaves.  It's always an eye opener when you experience life through a different set of eyes. 
I also took this trip to Tennessee to see my dad.  As some of you may know, a few weeks ago he was diagnosed with Leukemia.  It's been a very stressful and worrisome couple of weeks.  I have to admit that when I saw him in the hospital, he looked better than I expected.  Outside of a little hair loss, weight loss and being tired, he was still my dad.  It was a little disconcerting to see him in that setting, but he looked good.  We got good and bad news on Saturday.  An early morning phone call from my step-mom told us that he was running a fever of 102.  By early afternoon, the fever had broken and I went to see him.  He was in good spirits and the doctor had just told him that his bone marrow test came back great and that there weren't any leukemia cells present.  AWESOME!!!!  He would have to stay in the hospital till his white blood cell count came back up and he regained his strength, but for the time being, he was out of the woods.  The chemo had worked and now he would just have to have chemo on an outpatient basis after his release.  Looks good.
 I got to spend time with my brother and older sister, and even though we hadn't seen each other in a long time, we fell back into the same click that we always had.  My sister the clown, my brother the serious one and me:  the ever changing one.  But for the first time in a long time I felt comfortable.  I was me.  I didn't have to try to be someone else or feel like I needed to hide anything.  It didn't bother me, to just be me.  And I feel great about that. 
On the way to the airport that Sunday, I looked out the window at the East Tennessee countryside and for the first time ever after a visit, I wanted to stay.  I wasn't bothered by the memories of all the bad things I had been through there and inflicted upon everyone else.  I was able to think of the possibilities of what can come.  What new future might develop and that I felt welcome to come back there at any time.  I was free of the past and ready to move forward into a great tomorrow.
So....Chad, Amy, Joshua, Mike, Dawn, Mom, Dad, Connie, Courtney, Haig and all the other members of my family....immediate and extended, the Hawaiian/Samoan culture has a word for family that means all that touch and are meaningful in your life....Ohana.  I love you all.